“I can’t wait to be married” is the silent whisper in the heart of many ladies which makes them marry the wrong person.
A story was told of a beautiful young lady who in her late thirties was anxious to get married. As she got fed up with having to wait for Mr. Right, she settled for the available man who had been pestering her for marriage. Due to her rising age, she opted for the available choice. A few months into the marriage, she realized she had made the wrong choice, and righting her wrong seem to be impossible.
Waiting is hard. It’s like telling a hungry man to hold on a while for his meal to be warm so he won’t scald his tongue for taking it hot. It’s almost becoming impossible to wait to get it right in life when several things want you to hasten up.
Everyone has their waiting season. When God is the Shepherd of your soul, there are periods He puts you on hold, not because He is wicked, but to prepare you for the best He’s bringing your way.
Most time, many can’t wait for His best, especially ladies, and they settle for less. Why do ladies get so desperate to be married? I’ve counseled many and I found out that ladies tip the scale in this case.
Truth be told, becoming desperate to be married is caused when you take your eyes away from God, and you focus them on your problems. It was when Peter shifted his eyes away from Jesus that he began to sink because of what he saw – the boisterous wind.
Why are you desperate to be married?
It is bad to compare your life with others. Even if their lives should motivate you, let it not push you into comparison. Paul said those who compare themselves among themselves are not wise.
Why compare your age with your mates or friends? Everyone has their time zones, or timelines in life. The fact that you’re age mate, classmates, or cousins does not mean you’re destiny-mates in life.
Never compare chapter one of your life with chapter ten of someone else. Someone younger than you can be married before you, it does not mean you’re a failure. Do you know that your younger sibling can be married before you because God destined it that way? Take your eyes off comparison and do the needful while you wait.
2. Age factor
Age is just a number when you have not allowed it to achieve what it should do in your life. Some levels of maturity are attached to a certain age and stage in life, and many do not develop into them on time.
If in your late twenties or thirties you still act and reason like a child or baby mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and financially, marriage isn’t good for you. In short, it is good that you should be alone.
Don’t allow your age to be the catalyst for your desperation. It wasn’t the day Adam was created that God gave him a wife. Grow, don’t groan.
“My people are destroyed,” why did the Bible say this; “for lack of knowledge.” It’s ignorance for a lady to be desperate for marriage. Why should you be desperate even if you have everything it takes to be married now?
I’m not saying you should be nonchalant about getting married, but you should understand that it is one thing to be married, and it’s another thing to be married to the right person.
If it doesn’t take you time to “arrive” in life, or be ready for marriage, don’t allow your “speed” in achievement to push you into marriage. Take your time to find the right person. Marriage is only successful to the end that a right man and woman marry each other. That’s the first thing to do to get it right.
Let the truth you know set you free, rather than allow lies to get you desperate. And if you don’t know the truth, buy it, don’t sell it for sweet and convincing lies, then obey the truth you have.
4. External pressure
A major reason people become desperate for marriage, aside from age, and comparison is due to the pressure they receive from friends and families. Don’t allow it.
You need to build a tough skin against pressure – from within and without – if you want to marry right. There’s nothing you will do right when you are desperate to get it done. You can be encouraged, but never let it get to the point of desperation.
Marrying early is good, but marrying the right person is the best. Not everyone would marry at 25, 30, or 35 years, and when they marry, those who married early are not better than them. You need to know this truth. Never measure your success in life based on the achievement of others, let your success be defined based on the judgment of the one who created you.
Are you becoming desperate for marriage even in 2022? Be careful not to marry the wrong person. I reiterate, there’s nothing you do in haste that ends well. Prayerfully, patiently, and carefully make the right choice of who to marry; you won’t regret doing so.
It is better to marry late and marry well than to marry early and regret your decision.