The subject of love, from time immemorial, has been the most popular issue almost everyone can relate with. We talk about love in our relationships, marriages, or our love for material and immaterial things such as money, music, sport, or cars.
Many have searched the web or read books on how they can improve their love life, or become a better lover. However, many haven’t been able to find lasting solutions to their love-related issues.
To improve your love life, there are things you need to know about love. More so, you can also apply these things I’d share should you have struggles loving God the way you ought to.
However, there is a caveat. These things you’d read won’t be effective if you apply them to the wrong person and in the wrong relationship. It can only work when you’re committed to the right relationship and the right person.
Below are these things about love you should know.
Here we go.
1. Passion
As fuel is to fire, so is passion to love.
Passion is the driving force that sustains long-lasting relationships. When two people are passionate about each other, it helps their union.
Meanwhile, two things enhance your passion to love; desire and delight are what you need.
Do you desire your spouse, or someone you’ve adjudged better than them has become your crush? When you channel your desire to your spouse, only then will you be passionate about them.
David said as the deer pants after the water so his soul longs after God. If you don’t long after Him or your spouse, your love would simply wax cold, and someone or something else would take their place.
It is what you desire that you’d delight yourself in. If you don’t desire your spouse, how then can you delight in them? Passion is greater than feelings or emotions, although you need emotions to sustain it, it must be fanned to flames by deliberate choice.
2. Commitment
Trust me, it is hard.
This is why some or many have believed that being monogamous is impossible. Because of their lack of commitment, many have jumped into several relationships while looking for the “perfect” one.
No perfect person exists – except in your mind. Those who seem to be perfect had spouses who were committed to bringing out perfection from their imperfections.
Remember that the grass is greener only where it’s watered.
Jesus would have given up on Peter had it been He wasn’t committed to him. Who knew he could ever preach a sermon that would get 3000 people converted, a man who denied Him thrice and returned to his fishing business ab-initio?
True love is committed and it requires commitment.
God’s too committed to failing you, only if you won’t give up on Him. Are you committed to Him?
Commitment isn’t possible when there’s no devotion. Devotion is the perpetual giving of oneself to a person or a cause. It is unwavering; this is why Paul asked that what shall separate us from the love of God?
Now, may I ask: is there anything or anyone that would separate you from loving your spouse or God? If there’s one, deal with them now.
3. Sincerity
I agree that you love your spouse or God, but are you sincere about your profession of love?
Sincerity can’t be achieved when your motive to be in love is wrong. If your reasons for being in love are based on mundane intentions, over time, it would flicker.
Love is unconditional and what makes it unconditional is tied to the genuineness of your motive. If your reason for loving him is selfish or carnal, love would be extinct once you can no longer fulfill such a motive or desire.
If you love her for the wrong reasons, when those things fizzle, there would be problems in your relationship. If you’d love it sincerely, let it be based on something that can stand the test of time.
Sincerely, ensure you choose to love your spouse unconditionally because it was commanded and a choice you made; otherwise, the transient reasons would reveal themselves with time and chance.
4. Sacrifice
Like I said that commitment is hard in a love relationship, sacrifice too is pretty much hard.
How can you tell of a man who gave His only begotten Son just for the salvation of those He created who were rebellious and wicked? Yet, He demonstrated love through sacrifice.
You can give without loving, but you can’t love without giving. But the real demonstration of giving comes through sacrifice.
Certain men jeopardize their lives to get David water to drink in the heat of the most brutal war in Bible times. Solomon offered 1000 oxen, and over 100,000 sheep all because He loved the Lord.
What sacrifice have you made to make the life of your partner or spouse better than how you met them? What sacrifice have you given since you claimed to love God?
Just as it was with God that the first sacrifice He wants from you is a broken heart and a contrite spirit, you can’t give sacrificially to your spouse or partner when your heart is elsewhere.
Where your heart determines your treasure and who you give. If your heart is committed to your partner or God, it’ll never be focused on anyone or anything else – but them.
Because David was so into God, he told Araunah that he won’t give Him any offering that doesn’t cost him anything. If you truly love your spouse, to what length have you gone to prove that?
5. Selflessness
Man, by default is a selfish creature. He’s only interested in all that involves him. If there’s nothing he stands to gain, he won’t be responsible or committed to such.
If you’d take your love life to the next level, then you must ensure you sprinkle some pinch of selflessness.
Another word for selflessness is to be unselfish. Love is kind in the sense that it considers others first before their own needs are met. Meanwhile, selfish people do things to please themselves without considering other’s interests.
Love isn’t selfish but selfless.
To overcome selflessness, you need a compassionate heart. It takes a kind-hearted person to be selfless. However, when selflessness is mutual in a relationship, the outcome of such union will be perpetual bliss.
Without much more, evaluate your love life to see if you’re no longer passionate, sincere, committed, selfless, and sacrificial towards God or your spouse? Love is a beautiful thing when you do these things.
However, happy are you if you do these things in your love relationship.
