The rate at which Church girls fall cheaply into the hands of some brothers or men in the church is painful and worrisome. These playboys or sharp guys who are just churchgoers play on their naiveness and mess up their lives.
I have seen and counseled some innocent church girls who were victims of heartbreak, premarital sex, and sexual immorality because they felt love and relationships are as simple as reciting Psalm 23.
I do not refer to a church girl as a churchgoer, but ladies who are simple, sincere, and are more emotional in their dealings with men.
A church girl could also be a firebrand, tongue-talking, or a vibrant lady but she lacks the understanding of the games lots of men play with the heart and lives of women.
When it comes to having a personal devotion to God, some church girls would stand out, but on the matters of dealing with the opposite sex, most church girls are inexperienced in this regard; little did they know that Satan desires to sift them off like wheat.
Dear Church girl, guys who play games with the lives of women believe you are deceivable and easy to get. You may think that’s untrue but they may likely be right when you fail to do the needful.
Don’t fall in love with a man in or out of the church without probing into the fabric of his soul prayerfully, patiently, and carefully. Prove all things – spiritually and physically – and hold fast onto that which is truth.
Men are deceivers. Women too are tricky.
Don’t get emotional with any man until you have done the needful spiritually. It is normal to be flabbergasted or excited with his personality impression, spiritual charisma, or physical appearance; but don’t let these get into your head.
Men who deceive church girls believe you can be bought cheaply with a price when they act spiritually. One of the ways they do this is to tell you those things you want to hear about Christianity, God, and the Christian faith.
For instance, he will tell you he’s a virgin and he believes in no-sex until marriage. But somehow and someday, he will attempt to lure you with words like “It’s not too bad,” “Everyone is doing it,” “Let’s do it once,” “Don’t be too spiritual,” and so on.
If you are the type that loves to be told dreams or revelation from God as touching who to marry, or you talk about it so much, he can conjure up one to fool you into believing that you two are meant for each other. Be careful!
Don’t be hasty to get him into your heart when he’s not a man after God’s own heart. Treat his matter with a pinch of salt and never have sleepless nights over him.
More so, never ignore God’s leading because you have found a supposed godly brother. A church player might not lure you away from God directly, but he would demand more attention from you than you’d give God.
Any relationship that draws you away from God will drag you to hell and destruction. Be careful when you notice that you spend more time with him than you’d do with Him.
Be careful when you now skip your quiet time with God to have a quiet time with him, especially during those ungodly hours of the day on social media.
Dear church girl, be very careful with brothers in the church, they can pretend to be nice having the fruits of the Spirit, but they’re simply green leaves having no fruits like the fig tree Jesus cursed; they can fake having a zeal for God, but they do not have an experiential knowledge of Him.
My dear, having spiritual gifts doesn’t translate to having the fruit of the Spirit, neither does his involvement in church activities meant that he’s spiritual.
Don’t confuse the title with mantle, one is a label while the other is an endowment of God’s grace upon his life. It is not the pulpit that makes a man, men are made by God in the secret place.
Avoid secret relationship with brothers, because sin thrives in secrecy. Avoid getting close to a brother unduly. Frequent communication and attention would corrupt good manners, and it would also breed emotional intimacy, and if care isn’t taken, it’ll land you in the bed of sexual immorality.
There’s a place of spirituality and sexuality.
Those side or front hugs you tag harmless are not vital, a simple handshake doesn’t make you are unsocial, or that you lack exposure. Be careful not to send wrong signals to a brother, or create a false assumption for yourself.
Don’t cast your pearls before swine lest they rend you. Your heart should be given to God, and not any brother until he has been studied to show himself approved unto God.
More so, your body is God’s Temple, let no one have access to it either by tapping current stylishly, or through the greet one another with a “holy kiss” doctrine.
Dear church girl, watch and pray.
Don’t just pray alone, do both. Watch it when you’re getting unnecessarily close or fond of a brother, or you now give him special attention above others.
Don’t assume he is the one even if he is a papa, pianist, pastor, a preyo, your youth president, choirmaster, Sunday School teacher, or even a bench warmer.
I wish I could say more to you on men, relationships, sex, finding the right person, issues about yourself, and several other but space won’t permit. But I believe the Spirit of Truth would guide you into all truths on this matter.
Are all church brothers bad? Heck, no!
I tell you the truth and I lie not, there are wonderful brothers in the church, but you need God to find them. You can’t find them by observation, but by revelation, patience, and carefulness.
Get rooted in God. Be sold out to Him. Let your heart be so hidden in God that it would cost a man who is after God’s heart to win your heart in love, not the bro. Delilah or pretenders.
Walk with Him genuinely. And trust in Him with all your heart. Please do not lean on your understanding when it comes to relationship matters. Buy the truth, sell it not!
With His wisdom, knowledge, and understanding, you will escape from the hands of evil brothers or strange ones who parade themselves as God-fearing brothers or brethren.
I care, but God cares for you the most.
Can we share the grace? 😁
© Adeniyi Tim Oluwamayowa 2020