This saying dates as far back as 1546. I’m sure you don’t know how old it was. It was within a collection of proverbs written by John Heywood and history had it that it was first used in the United States in 1677.
The first time I came across this idiomatic expression was during those times we were told to write essays with such a title or a story that ends with that phrase.
I’m sure you know the meaning, but do you apply it in your relationship?
Before you leap into that relationship or do what might later lead to regret, consider the consequences before you act. Many ignore this, only to realize that they did what they were not supposed to do. However, when reality sets in, they regret their decision.
As they say, prevention is better than cure, is a truth you must never joke with. Look at those things you need to pay attention to, and when you pay attention, don’t ignore the truth.
Before you leap into that relationship, look at some of the following.
1. Background
No matter how good, beautiful, handsome, wealthy, or healthy a person maybe, if they are still influenced by their upbringing, you might have to reconsider your relationship with them.
Am I wrong to have stated that? See what the Holy Book says: If the foundation is destroyed, what can the righteous do?
What can a man do when his wife-to-be is just a carbon copy of her mother, in terms of negative tendencies? What would a woman do when her spouse to be can’t just take his eyes off those creatures in a skirt?
It is a fact that people from dysfunctional homes are not likely to have a good marriage, but the truth is that they can have a successful marriage once they have been separated from it.
Don’t think love you would make them change. Change is deliberately sought, and it’s a personal decision. There are some backgrounds psychotherapists cannot heal, it’s in the bloodline, and true healing can only happen through prayer and transformation of the mind.
2. Belief
This has nothing to do with whether he prays five times or attends midweek service, what do they believe in? If you’re incompatible in values, don’t plunge into the relationship.
The belief system of your partner determines their action and inaction in your relationship. Some beliefs are patterned based on negative exposure, education, and experience about life; while some are formed based on personal opinion.
If your belief systems are not in tandem with each other, it’s wise to rethink your decision. There is no issue in marriages or relationships that cannot be solved if the parties involved had a mutual agreement in values.
3. Foundation
If you build your relationship or marriage on the wrong foundation, don’t expect success when the storms of life come. However, you can’t divorce a person from their foundation, they need to disconnect themselves.
How did you meet? What were the circumstances that surround your coming together?
I heard about a lady who literally “hijacked” a man from a lady who they were in a relationship together for over a decade. In no distant time, they planned their wedding without having a qualitative courtship. Few years into their marriage, the realities of life set in, and now she’s regretting her decision.
Who brought you two together?
If what brought you together is not strong enough to keep you going in marriage despite the challenges of life you’d both face, my dear, look before you leap. Don’t think the lovey-dovey or mushy-mushy feelings would keep you.
The foundation of a relationship or marriage is more important than the relationship itself. The best foundation you can ever build your relationship on is not love at first sight, mutual chemistry, or those mundane things you’ve been made to believe; if it’s not God, don’t go further.
And when I say, God, I do not mean through emotionally induced dreams or prophetic declaration that you’d both marry. You must both have your convictions and confirmation from God because it would be tested.
Lastly, let me add this to it; before you leap, consider:
4. Character
That’s he’s tall, rich, and handsome, or that she’s beautiful, endowed, and fair in complexion is not the case for a successful relationship. As good as the design of a posh car might be, if the engine is not durable and efficient, that kind of car isn’t worth a good buy.
The character of who you are in a relationship with is more important than their charisma or physical appearance. Beauty or handsomeness can get you a spouse, but the making of a good spouse is in the character.
There are some characters you must never manage, and the top of the lists are anger, infidelity (both emotional and sexual), and telling lies. You’re never safe when you’re in a relationship with someone who has those personality flaws.
Don’t allow self-pity or ignorance to push you into a relationship with someone with a bad character. A bad character cannot be managed or should be tolerated when the person involved does not see a need for change.
Consider the background, belief, foundation, and character of that person you want to spend the rest of your life with before you hop into the relationship. It is better to look before you leap than to look after you have leaped.
What other things should be considered before you go into a relationship which must not be overlooked?
