One major question many ask in their opposite-sex relationship is: who is the right person, how do I recognize him or her when he or she comes?
Many look for signs, codes, or guidelines to identify who the right person is. While it’s not bad to seek signs, it’s unthinkable to focus on it.
You can’t find the right person through signs, it is a journey you need to embark on – of being transformed to be the right person, and then you possess the capacity to recognize them when they come.
While many relationship coaches or experts had attempted to answer this question with titles like: “9 Ways to Identify Mr or Miss Right,” “How to Identify the Right Person” and several others, many have been left confused in their search for the right person.
Lots of people had pretended to have these signs, but they lacked the substance of what makes people right.
Do you know you can only identify the right person when you have become the right person? And on the flip side, it’s not enough to be the right person, you need to be positioned at the right place to discover the right person.
Consider the scripture below.
“And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman because she was taken out of Man” (Genesis 2:23 KJV)
With so much audacity and accuracy, Adam recognized the right woman when God brought her to him. How could this be possible?
To answer that question, you need to resolve the following questions as you put yourself in Adam’s shoes and do what he did.
Who is Adam? How did he know she was his bone and flesh? Who told him she was taken out of him? Where is Adam?
Please patiently read this article as He grants you understanding.
1. Who is Adam?
You can easily tell me Adam was the first man who God created. That’s true. But if you limit your understanding to this without relating this to yourself, you won’t learn.
Adam was created by God, have you been created by Him? Don’t just whisper yes, kindly read on.
The devil marred His first creature, but Jesus came to recreate what the devil destroyed. To identify the right person, possess the right spirit.
If God must recreate you, then you must be SAVED and BORN AGAIN.
Salvation regenerates your spirit and makes you right with God. But being born again grants you access into His kingdom. And you must be born (influenced) of water (word) and of His Spirit.
Those who are born again are not led by sight or material things in their choice of who to marry, they are led by the Spirit of God.
Because Adam was the right person and the Spirit of God was in him, he needed no sign or formula to decode who the right person is.
Dear reader, anyone can fake signs most relationship counselors would tell you through pretense. But the Spirit of God will clearly show you when deceivers come.
Are you influenced by His word and Spirit to possess the capacity to recognize the right person accurately? Or you are looking for 7 signs and 9 ways to identify them without working on yourself to be the right person?
Don’t run after signs. Be in the right position with God so you can recognize the right and wrong person without man-made formula, but through divine intuition.
And when you live within His kingdom like Adam, though you’re in the world, it’ll be easy for you to discern the right person accurately without guessing or confusion.
2. How did he know that she was his bone and flesh?
To answer this question correctly, see this…
“And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof” (Genesis 2:21)
Adam was made to sleep.
My brother and sister, go and sleep.
Sleep connotes REST.
Stop looking for a Facebook post with signs and formulas that would show you the right person. Stop dating John or Johanna in search of the right person.
If you want God to show you the right person, rest in the Lord.
It is in the place of rest He will reveal the right person to you. It was while Adam slept he knew that God had taken his rib and flesh to make the woman for him.
In the position of rest, you will be able to identify the right person He wants you to marry which no relationship expert can accurately guide you to.
They can tell you superficial truths such as compatibility, agreement, purpose, marry a believer, marry your friend, and several others; all these do not accurately reveal His mind to you when you do not have a personal relationship with Him.
A man or woman can match up with those and may not be the right person for you.
When you’re resting, you’ll know Him more, understand His ways, discern His voice, and sharpen your spirit man.
You will even master how He speaks to you so that when wrong men and women come, you will easily identify them.
Go and rest, don’t be anxious to find the right person – rest!
3. How did he know she was taken from him?
There are two ways to know the right person when they come: through observation or through revelation. And the most accurate of these is through revelation – divine.
I do not mean to say you look for dreams, visions, or trance; it is God’s prerogative to decide whether He would choose those channels to reveal it to you.
You can also discern the right person through spiritual discernment. And if you would enjoy this privilege, you need to position yourself where Adam was.
This takes us to the fourth question.
4. Where was Adam?
If you say, Adam was in the garden, you’re right. But the garden means two things: the presence of God and the place of fulfilling His divine purpose.
It will be practically impossible for you to know the right person when you do not have a personal relationship with God.
No matter how explicit the signs you were given about the right person are, if you don’t know God yourself, you will be confused and deceived.
More so, you can’t recognize him or her when you don’t know why God created you – your divine purpose – and you pursue its fulfillment.
Every man or woman will look like the right person until you have an intimate relationship with God.
And mind you, you can’t know the right person when you toy with sin or you’re in an immoral relationship.
Come out of that ungodly relationship and cling to God so He can show you great and mighty things concerning your life and destiny.
Don’t be like those who want to know or find the right person, but do not want to pay the price.
It will cost you prayers, patience, understanding, knowing, and fulfilling your divine purpose, discernment, and being intentional to know the right person.
And it is a sheer waste of time to shrink your life in the brink of a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship with the hope of finding or knowing the right person; dating John or Justina won’t also help either.
In fact, taking names to men or women of God is more misleading than revealing if you don’t know God yourself.
And with all these said, would you still look for telltale signs that he or she is the right one? Or you will walk side by side with God as He directs your path to the right person?
Don’t seek signs. Rest. Be positioned in His kingdom. Be in the place of purpose fulfillment. Walk with God. Then, you will be able to recognize the right person and would say like Adam: This is my bone of bones and my flesh of flesh without an iota of doubt or confusion.