Why do some men cheat? And why are some women disloyal to their marital vows? Why do some singles double date, and cheat on their faithful partners? These are questions many don’t seem to find answers to, and many have accepted the erroneous saying that all men and women are cheats.
But, in a world where faithfulness is fast losing its fad, many no longer see staying faithful in marriage as the in-thing; it’s now becoming old-school to stick with your partner forever without having side chicks. Who do we blame?
No thanks to the media and the worldly philosophy that has entrenched in our values reasons not to stay committed to one’s spouse.
Recently, the news of a man whose wife had an affair with her boss had made some lost hope in being faithful in marriage or to find a faithful person. But is such news an excuse to drink water from other cisterns?
Well, to be a faithful spouse, it’s a decision you have to make because there will be 1001 reasons to cheat on your partner. Advice from some friends, negative voices that echo with a bang in your thoughts, and those unfounded suspicions can incite you to be unfaithful.
But like I said earlier, faithfulness is your personal choice – your decision. Others may cheat on their spouses, some may double date, but you must take your stand to stay faithful to your partner come what may and if that’s what you truly want.
Does doing this make you a fool? No!
However, to be a faithful spouse, you must never forget four things, and the fourth one is key to staying committed to your partner both in life and death.
What are they?
1. Understanding
A man or woman that’s bereft of understanding wouldn’t be faithful in their relationship or marriage. You know why? They’ll see and believe in the reasons why they can’t be. Mind you, those who wander from the way of understanding shall remain in the company of the dead.
You need to understand the prize of faithfulness and the pain of infidelity, if you don’t, you’d be easily talked into an affair.
Meanwhile, many cheat on their spouse because they lack understanding. Little wonder why many are destroyed for lack of knowledge (understanding). However, the kind of understanding you have about marriage would also determine if you’d be faithful or not.
You can’t have an archaic, worldly, or anti-scriptural understanding of marriage and you’d be faithful to your partner. Let there be a paradigm shift in your mentality and ask God for the understanding He gives.
It is your perception that influences your disposition to cheat or being loyal, and your mindset defines your personality.
Just so you know, understanding won’t help if you do not embrace…
2. Discipline
Grace is God’s investment over our lives, but discipline is our investment in ourselves. It is hard to be disciplined, but it’s highly rewarding.
There would be an array of temptations that’ll be targeted at you, but discipline would shield you.
Discipline is the personal creed or principles that you set for yourself. It can also be said to be your rules and regulations to put you in check.
Do you know that hugging the opposite sex may not be a crime? Neither is it a sin to look at beautiful women or handsome men? But when you’re disciplined, you won’t throw your arms around everyone you meet or look to the point of lusting.
To be faithful to your spouse, discipline the things you do around the opposite sex. Be disciplined in your talk and touch. Don’t be handsy or lewd. Any act of indiscipline around the opposite sex would set you up for infidelity.
As you’re disciplined, embrace…
3. Determination
Do you know that no force on earth can undermine the resolve of a determined soul?
If you want to be a faithful spouse, then you must be determined in your heart to be one. Determination is the product of the will, and it’s the price to pay to stay disciplined.
I’m sure you know that your partner might push you to the point of being unfaithful, but when you’re determined that both their action and inaction wouldn’t make you bulge, then you’ll stay faithful.
Meanwhile, those who make the excuse to have an affair in marriage or their relationship only do so because they lack the determination to be faithful.
Be a Joseph, and be determined like Daniel who purposed in his heart that he’d not defile himself in the land of Babylon with the delicacies he was offered.
And to your determination, add…
4. The Fear of God
The most important thing that makes you faithful aside from understanding, discipline, and determination is the fear of God.
I love Joseph’s experience with his master’s wife. Here’s what he said: “Shall I do this great wickedness and sin against God?” I’m sure you know there was no religion when he made that statement, but he was only God-conscious.
The fear (high regard) of God will make you more God-conscious than to be sin-conscious. When other things fail, the fear of God will keep you standing. Until you consider infidelity as great wickedness against God and your spouse, you’d never be faithful.
More so, I’ve discovered that those who give an excuse to cheat on their spouses are godless. Trust me, we’re surrounded by temptation, but that’s not a license to be unfaithful.
That you go to church or you’re a pastor doesn’t mean you have the fear of the Lord. It is a personal choice to fear Him, and you can make that choice today because there’s a reward for it.
Are you finding it hard to stay faithful in your relationship? Is your partner cheating on you and you believe that paying them back in their coin is the best way to get revenge?
Well, you can’t pay evil with evil, and you’d have a good end, neither can you overcome evil with evil. Understand that infidelity does not only affect you, it’s a seed you sow for your unborn child. Come what may, choose to be disciplined, be resolved to stay faithful no matter the situation you’re in; and above all, embrace the fear of God.
A faithful man and woman are difficult to find, will you be one, or you’d make it more difficult to find one?
