If many of us had probed ourselves before we made some consequential decisions, our lives would have been better off than what it is now – especially in marriage or our love relationships.
On the matter of relationships that need carefulness, patience, and discretion, it would be a good thing if you ask yourself some questions that would help you make the right decision on who to marry.
Many are so emotional about their relationship that they cast off restraint and throw themselves into the person who catches their emotional fancy without doing the needful.
I’m sure you know that if the goal of your love relationship isn’t marriage, it is wise to quit before you plunge into the relationship that would destroy you.
Through years of study, experience, and counseling, I found out that asking some questions could help you put your feelings in check so you can think straight and make the right decision on who to marry.
Many think with their heart at the peak of their excitement in a relationship, only to use their head to analyze the situation when problems come. For ladies, especially Christian singles, here’s the question you should ask and think deeply before you answer it.
Is he a man I can truly submit my all to?
That a man has material possessions, admirable physical appearance, personality impression, financial worth, spiritual charisma, or social relevance doesn’t mean he’s a man you can submit to.
Do you think it was by chance that wives were commanded to submit to their husbands?
Don’t think those butterfly rumblings in your belly is all there is about submission. Submission demands that you allow him to exercise his leadership over your life whether he’s a man indeed or not. The man you marry has a lot to influence concerning your emotional, mental, and spiritual health. He can either make or mar your destiny – dreams, ambition, or pursuit.
What makes a man submission-worthy is more than those things I listed up above. A man’s character, mindset, and understanding determines if you can submit to him. Make no mistake to think that the emotional excitement you have towards him will make him earn your submission.
The second thing that would make a man earn his wife’s submission without placing a demand for it lies in his head. Not the head that wears a crown, but the authority figure he’s submitted to.
There are men whose head is their ego, experience, exposure, business, career, ambition, or those things I earlier mentioned.
A man’s head determines how he’d treat you as his wife. If what controls him is not God, and he lacks the understanding of how to treat a woman, you’d have issues submitting to him as a wife.
More so, you’d have issues to deal with on the matters of submission when a man does not love God with a genuine heart. Forget his activities in the church, or how well he spoils you, a man who loves Him will treat you dearly – provided you’re the right one for him.
Submission isn’t a big deal when a woman submits her all to God and she marries the right man who would love her as Christ loved the church. Do such men exist?
Oh, yeah, if you allow Him to position you where the right man would find you. Don’t keep a relationship with a man you can’t submit to his leadership. Many don’t envisage this before they say, I do, only to rebel and endure the man they married later in the future.
As a man, are you exempt from this question? You also need to ask: Can I love her the way I love myself?
Not all beautiful women are lovable because the character of some could be a turnoff. Meanwhile, you can’t love the wrong woman and you’d find it easy in marriage.
Ponder on that question, to love a woman isn’t difficult but a lot of men do not understand how to love a woman. Loving a woman means you’d accept everything about her – embrace her when her breast sags or she increases in size – including the good, bad, and the ugly.
More so, to love a woman would amount to taking full responsibility for her life. If you don’t have the capacity to provide for her needs – not just in monetary terms – but her emotional cravings, do not ask her out.
Women aren’t difficult if you’re fortunate to marry the right one. The major problem of most of us men is that we think basking in our pride or ego defines our manhood, or in our ability to exercise authority over a woman.
If you marry the right woman and you do the right things to keep her falling in love with you, trust me, you’re a man indeed. A man who doesn’t love himself cannot love you. A man who doesn’t understand what love is would think the wrong things he does to you is love.
Dearly beloved, the question of love or submission should drive you into the state of evaluation. Check if he’d still be the man you’d submit to ten or fifteen years later. Take time to make the right choice before you ask her out, or say yes to him.
To make the right decision on this matter, do not ignore the place of God. If He doesn’t matter in this regard, I would have shown you commonsensical wisdom tips to help you out. But He’s all that matters!
Submitting to a man won’t be a problem if you prayerfully, patiently, and carefully choose the man you marry while loving her won’t be rocket science when you involve God before you ask her out.
To your relationship success,