Of all the things that make marriage blissful and successful, the kind of person you marry and who you become has a lot to do with it. Finding the right partner has kept many singles waiting. However, there are certain mysteries behind it that most of them do not know.
Never forget that if you, as the right person, marry the wrong person, no matter your prayer and fasting, it may be difficult or impossible to enjoy marriage. More so, if you marry the right person in this weak, immature, and vulnerable state you’re presently in, you’d be a pain to whoever you marry.
There are several mysteries enshrined in finding the right person. I’ll talk about the mystery of time.
I’ve always emphasized this, and it is a scriptural truth that it wasn’t the day God created Adam that He gave him a spouse. It took a while because he was given his soul mate.
Why is this so?
Those who are ignorant of the time dimension required to find the right person usually rush ahead of time. They jump from one relationship to the next while looking for the right person. Meanwhile, finding the right person can’t be done by hopping in and out of relationships, you need to learn the truth about it.
It takes time to find and become the right person. Before God gave Adam a partner, he was busy doing something that God had ordained for him. You have to become the right person before you find the right person.
Have you discovered what God has destined you to become in life? It is not enough to have a degree, a business, or a job. Those are good, but they’re mundane. Marriage was ordained for a purpose, and it is between a man who is doing what God has called him to do and a woman who was brought into his life to help him.
If you don’t understand the mystery of time while finding the right person, you’d jump into a relationship at the wrong time. What are the mysteries of time that you need to know about how to find the right person?
1. It takes time to discover why God has created if you haven’t paid the price to find it out.
If you don’t discover why God has created you, you can’t know who you are and who you’re supposed to be. Knowing who you are comes from the journey of self-discovery that you’ve embarked on.
When you know who God has made you to be, you will know who you’re supposed to marry and who you should never marry. It is ignorance of your true self that makes you pair yourself with every Tom, Dick, and Harry that comes your way for a relationship.
How can you, whom God has destined to be great, fall in love with someone who has no passion for greatness? It is unfortunate that most people don’t know who they are, and hence they abuse their lives and bodies in immoral relationships.
A king or queen has no business being in a relationship with the riffraff. Discover who you have been destined to be so you can know who you should marry or fall in love with. It will take you some time to discover it, but it’s worth it in the long run.
2. It takes time to become the right person if you’re not one.
What makes you the right person has nothing to do with your physical appearance or those mundane things people emphasize. Becoming the right person has to do with your character and your mentality.
You can fall in love with the container of a person, but you’d be married to their content. Beauty or being handsome can attract lovers to you, but your character would make them fall in love with you repeatedly or it would repel them.
So, do you have the right character?
Telling lies, dishonesty, being mean, rude, or harsh would repel people from you. If you don’t unlearn those habits that have become part of you, you’ll prevent yourself from marrying early.
Remember, if you can’t marry who you’ve become, it would be difficult for you to find someone to marry. Work on yourself to be the right person by pruning out those bad attitudes that would make you unmarriageable.
You may even have all it takes to be married—physically, emotionally, financially, or spiritually—but what kind of mentality do you have about the opposite sex and the institution of marriage?
You can’t be looking for the right person when your character and mentality are wrong. You can’t enjoy marriage when you have a poor perception of how to relate to your spouse. If you do not become the right person, it will be difficult to find the right person.
3. It takes time to find the right person.
Trust me, it takes time; and that’s true.
You may have had your life planned out like a business plan, but most of the time, God doesn’t work according to our plan. He has His plans too for our lives, and it is at His time that He makes all things beautiful.
Finding and meeting the right person may not happen after you’ve graduated from college or university. It may not even happen until years after you’ve been gainfully employed or you think you’re ready to “settle down.”
Meanwhile, several wrong people around you would look like potential suitors. If you leave God out of your quest to find the right person, you will marry who you think is right but find out how much they’re a mismatch for you in marriage.
Since it takes time to find the right person, this should tell you that you need a great deal of patience. Be patient, don’t rush or be desperate. Let nobody put pressure on you to be married. Take your time, involve God, and you won’t regret doing it at the right time.