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Understanding True Love

by Oluwamayowa Adeniyi
February 15, 2021
in Couples, Q&A Session, Singles
Understanding True Love

Understanding True Love

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Read Time: 5 mins

What’s the purpose of love? You may ask. Why are people wired to feel and express love? What’s true love, does it truly exist?

Love is one of the basic human needs, just as we need food and water to survive. Whether you like it or not, there’s going to be a point in your life where you’d need a person to relate to and love intimately; just one person, not persons.

If you’ve gotten to that point, or you’re hoping to get there someday, you need to understand what I’d show you about true love. The oblivion of love has made many experience negative things about love. It’s when you know how fake money looks like that you’d identify the original.

Love isn’t all those terrible or nasty things you were told. If you ever think love is wicked, you’ve only fallen in love with a wicked person.

A man who doesn’t have the nature of love or the capacity to express true love in him can’t express love to you, no matter how many sleepless nights he might have caused you. Likewise, a woman can promise you heaven and earth but cannot love you truly if the nature of love isn’t in her. I’m sure you’d agree with me that you can’t give what you don’t have.

True, or false?

However, I hope you know that there’s a scarcity of genuine love in the world today. Many are tired of the kind of love that can only be expressed through illicit sex. Ain’t you?

Because there’s a kind of love that’s untrue, there’s now the need for love that’s true; meanwhile, it’s sad that many don’t know what true love entails, even in a time like this, and they still go on to celebrate the love that’s not true.

A woman can buy you boxers as Valentine’s gift, but let’s see how committed she’d be to you in your down moments. A man can spoil you with goodies when things are rosy, but wait to see if he’d treat you respectfully. Love is more than that.

Now, let me ask you, what’s true love? What do you understand about it?

  1. It’s a kind of love that’s without pretense, pride, and prejudice; it’s kind.
  2. It’s love unfeigned; it’s the love that would stay with you through thick and thin.
  3. It’s unconditional. When I mean unconditional, it doesn’t give you 1001 rules and regulations before it loves or expresses love to you.
  4. It is sacrificial. Won’t you be happy when your partner can catch a grenade for you? I mean going out of their way to make you prosperous and happy and was done with the right motive. I want that kind of love, I tell you. Don’t you?
  5. In relationships, there are too many self-centered people claiming to be in love. They’re self-seeking, self-pleasing, and self-gratifying. It just has to be all about them, but true love isn’t just that, it’s selfless. 
  6. True love is more than that perception of love you’ve built up in your imagination which was influenced by the movie you saw or the relationship fantasy you had or what you were told.
  7. Just as love is not in word or tongue, but in deed and truth, true love can only be known and expressed when you know and love God with your all. 

Do you know that true love exists and it can be found? Do you even know that it’s even difficult to find true love when you don’t understand where and how to find it?

True love exists, if you believe it does, you’d find it. And if you think or believe it doesn’t exist, you’d attract what you believe. Moreover, believing it exists isn’t enough, you also need to know where and how to find it.

Many people think they’ll find true love on social media, in the church, or their neighborhood. But the truth is this, you can’t find it there. Meanwhile, there’s one sure place to find it, and I can guarantee you. In the club? Heck no. In your workplace? Never. 

The only place I can assure you’d find true love is in God. And before you tell me all those negative experiences you might have had or have been told about love relationships in the church, those who experienced such in the church took God out of their life and focused on the object of their love – the person. Isn’t that idol worship?

See, God won’t interfere in your love relationships if you don’t involve Him in it, this is why you must make Him the Alpha and Omega of every area of your life if you want to find and enjoy true love. And without an iota of doubt, I agree with Derek Prince’s book titled: God is a Matchmaker. In the true sense, He’s the perfect matchmaker for those who allow Him.

It is not enough to see a Prince Charming or the woman of your dreams, do you involve Him to guide and validate your choice? Because a relationship seems rosy at the beginning doesn’t mean it would have a great end. 

Your commonsense is ineffective to ascertain a man or woman to be the right person for you; let Him help you. I’m sure you remember I said that to love is a command, but to relate is a choice. Carefully, patiently and prayerfully find the person He approves of, so you can love each other truly.

Enough of these DNA testing, and cheating brouhaha that trends on social media; true love won’t cheat on you, not because it doesn’t have the opportunity to do so, but it is first committed to God before it chooses to be loyal to you. 

Many find love in the opposite-sex without loving God first. How does that work? A man who is first committed to God in his relationship with Him is the one that can love you truly. This is why it is commonly said that when couples love God first, they’ll love each other better.

But when you take God out of your search for love, or you don’t even love Him the way you should, and you seek love elsewhere, you’d be among those who say nasty things about love.

If the Biblical Joseph was in a relationship as at the time he was serving in Potiphar’s house, I’m sure you know that he might have accepted his master’s wife’s sexual passes by giving reasons for doing so. But because he considered it great wickedness to sin against God, he chose to stay faithful to Him, even though it cost him much.

True love will only be faithful to you as long as it is faithful to God. Let’s be frank, it’s difficult to be faithful to one person for the rest of your life, whether as single or married when you’re not faithful in your commitment to God.

So, it is in God that you’d find true love, not in church, or on social media. Let God lead you.

How will I find true love?

You must first have the capacity to love truly, then allow God to lead you to where you’d find it. Attempting to find love on social media or in church without God is like finding a poison to swallow. That’s suicidal!

You can’t give what you don’t have, neither can you attract what you don’t have. It is what is on the inside of you that controls what you attract around you.

What’s on your inside?

Your life must have gone through a supernatural transformation from within where your mindset has been renewed to love truly. But if your mind has been conformed to this world system in the way they express love, you can’t express true love.

Unlearn what you’ve known about true love that doesn’t square with the truths of the scripture. Learn the right things about love. Relearn it till it becomes flesh in you.

Must a man yell or beat you before you know he loves you? Who told you she must have sex with you to prove her love?

Quit hopping in and out of those relationships in search of true love. That’s sheer ignorance. Love God first. Involve Him in your love life. Change your wrong philosophy about love. Stay with Him. Then, He’d lead you to the person with whom you’d both enjoy true love.

Remember, because there are plenty of fakes doesn’t mean there are no original. It only depends on your understanding and where you’re looking for it.

Oluwamayowa Adeniyi

I am Oluwamayowa Adeniyi, a Relationship Enthusiast. My passion is to see to it that you enjoy a hassle-free relationship through a re-orientation of your mindset using Scriptural truths, whether you are single or married.

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About Me

Handling Relationship Issues

Tim Mayowa

Oluwamayowa Tim Adeniyi is a Relationship Enthusiast. He is passionate about transforming lives – of singles and the married – through the re-orientation of their mindset using God’s word, so they can enjoy a hassle-free relationships.

Handling Relationship Issues

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